|
Retailers: Now you can introduce ‘festive music’ into your stores. This month. December, right?
Only if I’m honest - and I generally try to be - I’ve had enough of the whole Christmas shebang (‘She bangs, she bangs...’) already.
The bloody Pogues mid-November whilst I’m busy trying on a coat in a shop? I don’t think so.
It’s sick, that’s what it is.
You know when you give children too many fizzy drinks and they go a bit
skeewiff? Well, what do retailers honestly think they’re doing to us
adults when we’re out shopping and all we can hear is the incessant
droning on of: ‘Snow is falling, all around us, children playing,
having fun...’?
Sheer and utter ghastly.
So yeah, by the time ‘the festive season’ really does arrive in earnest, I’m already sick to the back teeth of it.
Mrs. Edge likes Chrimbly tho’, bless her. She even gets a little
sentimental about the whole affair, particularly after a couple of
glasses of sherry. What’s more, this year she’s absolutely insistent
that we really are putting the tree up, after I’ve managed to convince
her otherwise for the past couple of years.
It’s probably an ‘age thing’, but whenever Christmas comes around these days, I always think, ‘What? Again? Already?’
I suppose, like anything, if you do it properly, then Christmas is
alright. But to do something properly takes time, imagination and,
usually, money, and by and large, most High Street stores can’t be
arsed with any of that, so they just bang out the same old CD music
they banged out last year and the year before and the year before
that...
But when you go round to someone’s house and they’ve really made an
effort, and the fire’s roaring, and there’s some choice Christmas
carols playing not too loudly in the background, and a glass of port is
shoved firmly in your hand, and a warm homemade mince pie in the other,
then that is definitely pretty handsome.
When it’s done tackily though, oh dear. Which, let’s face it, is what
we’re exposed to far more often than not, and that’s when it all
becomes... well, not to put too fine a point on it, it kind of drains
you of the will to live.
If you think about it, there’s a massive, ridiculous, high expectation
level attached to Christmas that rivals that of going on holiday. But
whereas a holiday generally delivers because you’re seeing and
experiencing something new and the weather’s blinding....what’s new
about Christmas?
Which is why a helluva lot more effort and creativity is required by
all concerned in order to turn that which to all intents and purposes
is exactly the same, into something new, vibrant and fresh.
Jot any good ideas you might have onto a postcard and send them to The Edge, please.
New Years Eve: For once I’m actually looking forward to New Years Eve.
For one thing, I reckon it’ll be good to see the back of 2009 because,
let’s face it, it’s hardly been the best of years, has it?
We’re spending it in Sewage (Swanage) this year and our friends The F
wits tell us everyone dresses up in fancy dress and congregates in the
centre of town where much ale drinking and merriment ensues, which all
sounds very Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall to me (who resides in Dorset),
so it should be good. And, y’never know, Jonathan Ross might even turn
up (he owns a farmhouse in Swanage)!
Last year, the good lady wife and I were in Krabi on New Years Eve and
the sky was literally awash with those lantern things with the flame
inside, and all the locals were down on the beach, and it was still
warm at midnight.
Watch it bloody well lash it down whilst we’re in Sewage (Swanage).
But whatever you’re up to at the end of this month, readers, The Edge
wishes you well. And remember, if we all make a little bit more of an
effort, then maybe things really don’t have to be the way they’ve
always been, and maybe we can make things just that little bit better.
I think both our faith and our pride could do with a much needed boost,
but that’s something we’ve all got to make happen. But if we each do
our bit, then collectively that can turn into a beautiful, wonderful,
powerful thing.
That’s what it says on the label, at any rate.
 |
Subscribe to this comment's feed
Columnists