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Written by Kingpin
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Tuesday, 28 April 2009 |
 A good friend of mine, who has to remain nameless due to legal reasons, has been working in the Metropolitan Police force for some years now, and was part of the task force assigned to police the G20 demonstrations recently, reports Kingpin. Looking at all the media furore, armchair criticism and wild speculation that's run rampant ever since, I thought it would be good for you people to hear what it was like from someone who was actually there, on the front line.
G20, as we shall call him, was kind enough to give me a telephone interview about his experiences and his thoughts on the protest, the police in general, and, of course, the unfortunate incident concerning Ian Tomlinson.
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Written by Kingpin
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Tuesday, 28 April 2009 |
 This month I have mainly been flogging a dead horse - at least that's what it feels like. Some of you may recall in my article dealing with the collapse of the economy a couple of months ago that I made mention of an underlying issue being the hideous overpopulation of our planet?
Since then, I've had quite a few arguments regarding my stance on such matters, learned a bit more about the issue itself, and decided that it's worth expanding upon here .....so be quiet and listen.
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Written by Kingpin
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Tuesday, 28 April 2009 |
 Over the recent Easter period, some friends and I decided to do something slightly different to simply getting drunk, so we decided that, as we’re all slipping into middle-age, going out to dinner as well as getting drunk, was the order of the day, writes Ian King.
The hardest part was actually trying to find a restaurant that was open past 4:00pm on Easter Sunday, and we must have tried at least a dozen within Chelmsford and its environs, all to no avail.
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Written by Kingpin
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Friday, 17 April 2009 |
This month I have mainly been delving into the realms of the supernatural (once again). Well, when I say ‘delving’, I actually mean swearing at the TV set and wondering how any halfway intelligent person can believe a word of such ludicrous bloody hokum.
I'll mention no names, but someone I live in quite close proximity to has a penchant for watching Most Haunted every now and again, and, predictably, it never fails to send me into a rage within seconds.
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Written by Kingpin
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Tuesday, 10 March 2009 |
This month I have mainly been learning about what it would actually be
like to be rich and famous. I'm sure I'm the same as most people when
it comes to this. Surely we've all indulged in daydreams about having
enough money to make Solomon blush and hordes of sycophants hanging on
our every word? |
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Written by Kingpin
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Tuesday, 10 March 2009 |
 Q. Dear Dr. Ian,
I've got a rather ‘delicate problem’ that I fear may require a trip to the quacks and a thorough
inspection of the ‘family jewels’. You're a man of the world; what's
the etiquette involved in getting your ‘Little General’ out at the
surgery?
Yours sincerely,
‘Big John’ Holmes.
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Written by Kingpin
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Wednesday, 28 January 2009 |
This
month I have mainly been studying the human brain. Not in a physical
sense, you understand; those woefully outdated notions of morality
and murder have kept me from getting my hands inside anyone's cranial
cavity. So instead, I've had to content myself with books and that
far less interesting form of study that doesn't involve hacksaws and
any screaming. |
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Written by Kingpin
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Thursday, 08 January 2009 |
Last month I have mainly been drinking far too much. Smoking too much. And, what’s more, loving every minute of it.
Pre-Christmas I, as you do, attended a 10th annual pub crawl event,
initially masterminded by a work colleague of mine a decade ago, and
it’s something that I and other stalwart fellows have attended every
year since. |
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Written by Kingpin
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Thursday, 27 November 2008 |
This month I have mainly been wondering why the bloody hell we haven't legalised drugs yet? I'm sure some of you (let's refer to you as idiots) have already had a woefully predictable knee-jerk reaction to that opening sentence, but settle down and let me explain. |
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Written by Kingpin
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Tuesday, 28 October 2008 |
This month I have mainly been loving the screams of anguish I've been hearing due to the ‘credit crunch’. Some people may call me a heartless bastard, and I'll freely admit to that. But the thing of it is, I really don't care. Yes, I'm well aware that this is causing many people severe problems - possibly even complete ruin in certain cases - but despite that, I still don't care because I honestly think we need it. |
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