What a legend!

Meet Amou Haji (80) readers; officially Iran and the world’s muckiest man, who confesses to not having bathed in 60 years.

Cleanliness equals sickliness, according to old Amou, who likes to smoke animal turds (see above) rather than Old Holborn.

Amou lives an isolated life (well he would, wouldn’t he) in a hole in the ground, or in a brick built shack during the extremely cold winters, constructed by local folks who felt sorry for him, in Dejgah village, southern Iran, where he lives off such delicacies as rotten porcupine.

However, the thing of it is, so far as anyone knows, without possessions or a multitude of worries, Amou is happy, and surely that’s what we’re all truly searching for, isn’t it?

Your editor knows he is, and what’s more, he ain’t gonna find it in Chelmsford!

So good on Amou for drinking up to five litres of water every day, rather than getting shitfaced and honestly not knowing anything about anything.

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