If WWII had happened today.

Deaks

Deaks

DEAKS takes you through his life's adventures, from leaving Rainsford Grammar School for the 'Advanced of Learning' to the present day, growing old disgracefully without shame or regret.
Deaks

Deaks

DEAKS takes you through his life's adventures, from leaving Rainsford Grammar School for the 'Advanced of Learning' to the present day, growing old disgracefully without shame or regret.


I was not around 75 years ago and I wouldn’t for one minute claim they were better times, how can they be better times when you have the ghastly risk of a doodlebug dropping on your new  ornamental sunken garden, or scoring a direct hit on your new keep up with neighbours Mercedes-Benz? Perish the thought, however, there are things in this modern world that I would change in a a heartbeat, wouldn’t you? 

This would be how it would be if World War II had occurred in today’s pussy footing, mollycoddling, snowflakery world;

1. Can I have more clarity on the “Your country needs you” slogan? It’s far too ambiguous and I’m a little bit confused by it. 

2. Why aren’t you doing more  to prevent these air raids during the night when we are trying to sleep? Also why does the blitz kill more people in the UK than any other country in Europe? 

3. Does the siren apply to everyone?  Could there not be different tones to the siren to apply to different people?

4. There are only male & female toilets in the air raid shelter and I don’t identify as either as I am ‘gender neutral’.

5. This respirator haversack has a leather strap and I’m a vegan. 

6. Why can’t I have Almond Milk on my ration card?

7. I find the term ‘black out’ highly offensive.

8. I find the lack of colour options within military uniforms so oppressive.

9. Why didn’t we have a stockpile of Spitfire aeroplanes at the start of this conflict?

10. Will it be OK to go to the seaside this weekend, even though there are still  Messerschmitt BF109’s in the air over Lowestoft?

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5 Responses

  1. I was around then, but I was only 6 and only knew all the things, that were going on were the norm. ( a bit like being in Syria now ) my memories were happy ones. Being in the air raid shelter while my Irish uncle sang Irish songs. Taking a dive in a field when a plane went over.
    Why part of the ‘war by terror ‘ was the bombing churches/ hospitals and schools. In the area I live now, one village school was happily playing in the play ground. No air raid siren as the plane was a lone German fighter, it mowed down the children and teachers killing and injuring many. In Midhurst a lone German bomber scored a direct hit on the local school, the lone school teacher and all 40 children were killed. Next time you go to Midhurst visit the graveyard, all the children were buried in one very long grave.

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