Cracked It

Sorry Deaks, I know you’ve been beavering away in your shed, scratching your head with a pencil behind your ear, attempting to find a cure for the virus. You can now stand down because I’ve only gone and cracked it. I’ve discovered our route out of this nightmare.  

So here goes. I’m sure we all subscribe to the idea that space-time is flat, and the number of possible particle configurations in multiple universes contain 10^10^122 distinct possibilities. Stay with me, it’s all fairly basic stuff and the sort of thing we routinely explored in second year physics lessons at the esteemed Rainsford Academy.  Anyway, with the infinite number of cosmic patches, the particle arrangements within them must repeat — infinitely many times over. This means there are infinitely many “parallel universes”: cosmic patches exactly the same as ours (containing someone exactly like you, me, Shaun etc.), as well as patches that differ by just one particle’s position, patches that differ by two particles’ positions, and so on down to patches that are totally different from ours. There’s even one out there in which you never have to queue for ages in the local Co-Op and I’m six foot two and incredibly good looking. 

So, all we need to do is locate the correct re-set button that will instantly transfer us to the appropriate adjacent parallel universe; it’s the one in which the different particle alignment means the market trader in Wuhan didn’t put a pangolin in a cage next to a bat.

How many times have we heard the government trot out their mantra about being guided by the science. Well here’s our opportunity. Let’s face it, this bit of science has a far better chance of saving mankind than the orange one’s suggestion of mainlining disinfectant. 

What do you reckon?